Fashion
Taylor Swift Fans: Black Friday Deals for Holiday Shopping
2024-11-29
Black Friday is here, bringing a plethora of deals that are sure to excite Taylor Swift fans. From fashion to beauty and beyond, there are numerous items to explore and snatch up. This holiday season, get ready to surprise your favorite Swifties with the perfect presents.

Unlock Unbeatable Black Friday Deals for Swifties!

BaubleBar: Friendship Bracelet Stack

During BaubleBar's big Black Friday event, beef up your friendship bracelet stack. Custom pieces like the brand's bestselling Pisa styles are 20% off, and a selection of beaded baubles are just $10. It's the perfect time to add some sparkle to your wrist.There's a wide variety of options available, allowing you to create a unique and personalized bracelet stack that reflects your style. Whether you prefer simple or more elaborate designs, BaubleBar has you covered.

Guest in Residence: BFF Gigi Hadid's Cashmere

Swift is often seen in splurge-worthy pieces from Gigi Hadid's cashmere label. Currently, it's offering 25% off sitewide. One of our favorites is the timeless cherry-colored crewneck she wore to a Chiefs game last season.The quality of the cashmere is exceptional, providing warmth and comfort. It's a piece that you'll want to wear again and again, and with the discount, it's an even better deal.

MAC Cosmetics: Ruby Woo Lipstick

For that red lip classic that Swift loves, MAC's bestselling matte blue-red shade Ruby Woo is a must-have. Right now, you can score it for a whopping 30% off.It's a staple in many makeup collections and loved by fellow A-listers like Rihanna, Janet Jackson, and Angelina Jolie. The formula is long-lasting and gives a bold, beautiful look.

Reformation: Checked Minidress and Footwear

Reformation is offering shoppers 25% off sitewide through Dec. 2. It's a great time to snag the checked minidress Swift wore to the US Open with Travis Kelce or something from their fantastic footwear department, which is another favorite of hers.The checked minidress is a trendy and versatile piece that can be dressed up or down. And the footwear selection offers a variety of styles to choose from, ensuring you find the perfect pair to complete your look.

EF Collection: Stunning Style

The 14-time Grammy winner has been wearing this stunning style on repeat all season. You can score your own for 25% off by entering the code GOLDEN at checkout.It's a unique and eye-catching piece that adds a touch of elegance to any outfit. With the discount, it's an affordable way to incorporate this style into your wardrobe.

Nars: Lip Colors

Enter the code CYBER at checkout to score 20% off the warm cinnamon lip color Swift's been reaching for nonstop lately. Or go for Dragon Girl, a siren red she's name-checked in the past.Nars' lip colors are known for their quality and long-lasting wear. These shades are perfect for adding a pop of color to your look and can be worn for any occasion.

Sheertex: Sturdy Patterned Tights

The sturdy patterned tights Swift swears by are 25% off right now. Along with the rest of Sheertex's editor-approved offerings, it's a great time to upgrade your tights collection.These tights are not only stylish but also provide warmth and coverage. They're a must-have for the colder months and can be paired with a variety of outfits.

Mazin Jewels: Sparkly Snake Ring

Anxiously awaiting "Reputation (Taylor's Version)"? Slip on this sparkly snake ring Swift herself owns. It's 30% off as part of Mazin Jewels' sitewide Black Friday sale when you use code BF30.The ring is a statement piece that adds a touch of glamour to any outfit. With the discount, it's an affordable way to own a piece of Taylor Swift's jewelry collection.

Amazon: Lush Lashes and More

Eyeing the icon's lush lashes? She's a big fan of this award-winning volumizing formula. She's swiped it on in her "Miss Americana" documentary and even sent it to a fan for "Swiftmas" years ago. With over 13,000 five-star ratings on Amazon to date, it's clear that others agree.This mascara gives your lashes a voluminous and beautiful look. It's a must-have for any makeup lover and now available at a great price.

Amazon: Taylor Swift Style Book

Written by the blogger behind Taylor Swift Style, this New York Times bestseller explores Swift's fashion evolution over the course of her career. From the curls and cowboy boots of her 2006 debut album to her sparkling Eras Tour outfits, it's a perfect present for any style-minded Swiftie.It's a detailed look at Swift's fashion journey and provides inspiration for your own style. It's a must-have for any fan who wants to learn more about her fashion choices.

Mejuri: Gorgeous Garnet Ring

Swift has worn this gorgeous garnet ring to three Chiefs games so far. And when you spend a minimum of $150, it's 25% off like everything else on Mejuri's site.The garnet ring is a beautiful and unique piece that adds a touch of elegance to your look. With the discount, it's an even better value.

Popflex: Pickleball Skort and Corset Bra

If you've been waiting to pull the trigger on Swift's viral pickleball skort, now's the time to strike. It's 10% off. Make it a matching set with the lavender Corset Bra, which is 15% off.The pickleball skort is both stylish and functional, perfect for your active lifestyle. And the Corset Bra adds a touch of femininity to the set.

Amazon: Bold Bomber Jacket

Rep Swift's guy on the Chiefs in the bold bomber jacket the songwriter wore to the Super Bowl. It celebrates the team's founding year and is 30% off with the code BLACKFRIDAY.This jacket is a great way to show your support for the Chiefs and add a stylish element to your wardrobe. With the discount, it's a steal.

Saks Fifth Avenue: Signature Scent

Rumored to be Swift's signature scent, this sandalwood-forward blend rarely goes on sale. But now's your chance to snag a bottle for less.The scent is unique and long-lasting, leaving you feeling confident and refreshed. It's a must-have for any Swiftie who wants to smell like their favorite star.

Amazon: Viral Tank

Swift was spotted wearing this viral tank in a Polaroid, and select colors are a whopping 30% off for Black Friday on Amazon. Shoppers praise it as "cute and flattering," "perfection," and "super stretchy."It's a versatile tank that can be dressed up or down and is a great addition to any wardrobe. With the discount, it's an even better deal.
Is Your Partner Gaslighting You? Signs & What to Do
2024-09-24
Gaslighting is a term that has gained significant attention in recent times. It often surfaces in casual online spaces like TikTok and Instagram infographics, leaving many wondering if it's happening to them. The origins of the word "gaslight" date back to a 1944 film, and its impact continues to resonate today.

Unmasking the Deceptive Tactics of Gaslighting

What is Gaslighting?

Gaslighting involves making statements or taking actions to make someone question their reality. This behavior is commonly seen in abusive romantic partnerships but can also occur in various relationships, including familial and workplace ones. As mentioned, it's about gaining control and avoiding accountability.

For example, in a romantic relationship, a gaslighter might make their partner question their own memories or perceptions. In a workplace setting, women, especially those of color, are vulnerable to being gaslit by superiors who dismiss their complaints. It's not just about lying; it's a deliberate attempt to confuse and manipulate.

Chandler Chang, a clinical psychologist, explains that gaslighting is a defense strategy used by the gaslighter to protect their ego. Their intention is to make the other person feel bad and avoid facing criticism.

What are some common examples of gaslighting?

1. **Dismissing needs**: In any relationship, it's important for both parties to have their needs met. But a gaslighter will often accuse their partner of being "needy" or "clingy" when they ask for support.

At work, this might show up as a superior denying a raise request even when the employee has proven themselves worthy.

2. **Withholding information**: A gaslighter will pretend not to understand the reason for a conversation or refuse to talk about it, then change the subject.

This tactic is a form of dismissal that leaves the other person feeling unheard.

3. **Denying harm**: When a gaslighter denies hurting someone and refuses to take accountability, it's a clear sign of gaslighting.

They might blame others or make the victim feel like they are the ones at fault.

4. **Forgetting events**: A gaslighter might deny entire events or statements they made just minutes ago, making the other person question their own memory.

This is a way to distort the truth and make the victim doubt themselves.

5. **Weaponizing love**: Gaslighters will use love as a weapon, claiming that their actions are because they love the other person too much.

They might use this to avoid accountability and get the victim to agree to their demands.

6. **Shifting blame**: Gaslighters will often divert the conversation to something the victim has done to shift blame away from themselves.

This can deal a blow to the victim's self-esteem and make them feel like they are always at fault.

7. **Using vulnerabilities**: A gaslighter will find a victim's vulnerability and use it against them to make them feel guilty.

For example, using a person's mental illness medication as a way to invalidate their concerns.

8. **Constant criticism**: By constantly criticizing, a gaslighter shifts blame onto the victim and keeps them in an unhealthy cycle.

The victim's focus becomes getting the gaslighter's approval instead of advocating for themselves.

What are some common phrases gaslighters might use?

"If that's not what happened, then you must be crazy.""They might say, 'I never said that. You're making it up.' ""They'll often use phrases like, 'Are you being overly sensitive? It was just a joke.' ""When confronted, they might respond with, 'If you really loved me, you wouldn't be saying this.' ""They'll also say, 'I'm the only one who stands by you. Everyone else thinks you're crazy.' ""And, 'My only fault is loving you too much.' ""They might use phrases like, 'You're just trying to make me look bad.' "

What do I do if I'm being gaslit?

1. **Consult a friend**: Trust your intuition and talk to a trusted confidant about how you're feeling.

They can validate your experience and help you see the reality of the situation.

2. **Determine safety**: Consider whether it's safe to confront the gaslighter. Confrontation might trigger more gaslighting.

If you do decide to confront, be clear about your goal and remember that you can't make someone understand.

3. **Have a conversation**: If you want to resolve things, find a calm time to discuss the issue with the gaslighter.

Describe specific examples of gaslighting and use "I statements" to express how you feel.

4. **Check-in**: After the conversation, check in with the gaslighter to see how things are progressing.

Agree to work on improving trust and closeness together.

5. **Cut ties if necessary**: If the gaslighter's behavior doesn't change or you feel unsafe, it might be best to end the relationship.

Use a firm statement to express how their behavior has affected you and that you need to move on.

If you're being gaslit, remember that you're not alone. There are resources and hotlines available for professional assistance.

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Whether to Rant to Friends or Seek Therapy?(With Friends Like These, You Might Need Both)
2024-09-29
Imagine a Sunday morning, sipping coffee in bed and lost in a good read when your phone buzzes. It's a long text from your best friend detailing her divorced parents' fight. Suddenly, you find yourself in an unexpected role - that of a virtual therapist. This is a common dilemma in our digital age where instant access to each other through phones has become both a blessing and a curse.

Double-Edged Sword of Instant Access

On one hand, having 24/7 access provides a sense of safety and security. We can always know where our contacts are. On the other hand, it has initiated the expectation that others should be available to respond at all times. This has blurred the lines between friends and therapists, especially for those without access to professional help.

Problems with Sharing Too Much with Friends

While sharing immediately with friends after a bad event can help access raw thoughts, there are more cons than pros. If we put all the responsibility of our mental health on one person, it can cause pressure and resentment. Friends aren't licensed therapists and may give advice based on their own experiences that may not work for us.For example, think about Carrie Bradshaw in Sex and the City. She thought her friends could help her, but they were as "f*cked up" as she was. A therapist, with their years of education and experience, can identify underlying behavioral patterns and tailor advice specifically to us.

Risks of Trauma Bonding and Codependency

Constantly having heavy emotional conversations with a friend can lead to trauma bonding. When they no longer need to talk about their trauma, they may not know how to be with us anymore. It can also create a sense of codependency where one person is always listening and helping, and there's no reciprocity.This can undermine our sense of autonomy and self-efficacy. For instance, if we always rely on friends immediately after a bad event, we might start to wonder what would happen if they weren't there.

What to Do When You Need to Rant

First, resist the urge to text friends immediately. Grab a journal and write out what happened, including your thoughts and feelings. This can help you process the experience. Then, bring the notepad to your therapy session or try mind-mapping to discuss your reactions with your therapist.If you decide to text a friend, briefly tell them how you're feeling and see if they're available to listen. Don't put all your eggs in one basket; turn to multiple friends for different types of support.

How to Reply When You Get the Text

You don't have to respond right away. Take your time to process the text and think about what to reply. Consider your friendship history and the nature of the problem. If it's a one-time issue, offer support. If it's a pattern, encourage them to seek professional help.For example, if a friend texts about a family conflict once in a while, it's okay to listen. But if they have a new issue every time you see them, suggest they reach out to a therapist.

Communicating Boundaries

When you see or call a friend, use "I" statements to communicate your boundaries. Let them know it's hard for you to keep getting long texts and that you feel more is expected than you can give. Mention the frequency if they're not aware.If they don't understand and get angry, don't feel guilty. You did nothing wrong. You can distance yourself or be firm in setting boundaries. Remember, it's not our place to expect our friends to be our therapists.In conclusion, while we want to support our friends, we also need to take care of ourselves. It's important to recognize the differences between friendship and therapy and communicate our needs and boundaries clearly.
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